Listen up, Men! Every woman has three men in her orbit.
This is the cold, harsh reality of modern dating: every woman has three men in her orbit. Your position among them determines how she treats you. If you don’t understand this dynamic, you’re likely heading straight for the bottom tier—the SIMP. And no man with self-respect should ever allow himself to end up there.
Let’s break it down.
First, there’s the main guy. He’s the one she truly wants, the man she’s dreaming about and hoping will text her first. She won’t say it, but she’s praying for his attention. This guy doesn’t chase her—he doesn’t have to. His focus is on his purpose, not on her validation. His confidence and independence make him magnetic, and ironically, it’s his indifference that makes her crave him even more. He’s in control because he’s not trying to win her—she’s trying to win him.
Then, there’s the backup guy. He’s the “nice” one, the one always available and endlessly supportive. This guy sends her “Good morning, Angel” texts while she rolls her eyes or replies out of pity to keep him hanging around. She’ll never fully commit to him, but she’ll keep him close for validation and emotional support. If the main guy disappoints her, she might momentarily entertain the idea of dating him, but only as a consolation prize. He’s not her first choice—he’s the safety net.
Finally, there’s the SIMP, also known as the “guy with no chance.” This man has zero value in her eyes. She doesn’t respect him, doesn’t value him, and certainly doesn’t see him as a romantic option. He’s the guy she ignores unless she needs something—money, validation, or attention. He’ll text her endlessly with things like, “Good morning, Angel” or “Did you sleep well, baby?” while she leaves him on read. When she finally replies, it’s often to ask for something. And what does he do? He sends the money, thanks her for acknowledging him, and waits for the next crumb of attention.
This dynamic exists because attraction is about power. The main guy has the power because he knows his worth and doesn’t give it away. The backup guy forfeits some power by chasing her but still holds enough value to be kept as an option. The SIMP? He gives away all his power the moment he prioritizes her over himself. He’s desperate, needy, and willing to sacrifice his dignity for scraps of attention.
Here’s the reality: you can’t change the game, but you can decide where you stand in it. If you’re not the main guy, walk away. Don’t waste your energy being someone’s backup plan or financial sponsor. Women respect men who respect themselves. They chase the men they can’t control, not the ones begging for their attention.
If you ever find yourself in the SIMP category, stop immediately. Refocus on your purpose, your goals, and your self-respect. Women are attracted to confidence, ambition, and independence. The moment you put a woman on a pedestal, you kill her attraction for you. You’re not her savior, her ATM, or her emotional crutch—you’re a man with a mission. Act like it.
Stop chasing women who don’t value you. Stop sending money to women who wouldn’t look at you if you were broke. And for the love of all that’s masculine, stop simping. Build your value, stay focused on your goals, and let the right woman come to you when you’re ready.
Be the man she chases, not the man she uses.
